Is Your Glass Half Empty or Half Full?

IMG_7130 So, its been quite a while since I composed a post.  There has been a lot going on in my personal life and a lot of changes taking place.  I have also started a free group for moms out there for accountability and support.  You can find out more HERE!  Not to mention my 12 week clients and the ones that have continued with me on a monthly plan.

Anyway, back to this current post.  Sometimes God and life just speak to me and I cannot ignore it.  As I stated above, my life is going through a lot of changes.  These changes have caused me to be introspective and really think about how I view life.  In addition to this, a couple of other things have happened that spoke to me.  The first is a patient I treated this past weekend who had been through Hell and back.   With his permission, I share part of his story.  He had a liver transplant in the late 1990’s.  The liver was not functioning well in his body so they left him open, packed him with ice, and tried to find a new liver.  While waiting, the liver started functioning.  Then, he had a long road of recovery ahead of him.  Fast forward to this past November and he began having tremors in his hands and arms.  He recently went for testing to figure out the cause.  The day of doctor visits was so taxing for him that he fell, broke his hip, and is now in rehab.  All of this would be frustrating for someone in itself, but it turns out that he is also self-employed as a painter.  He must be very good because he has already been commissioned to paint the portrait of an important staff member at the NC School of the Arts to mark the person’s retirement.  So, my point of telling you all this is that this man was pleasant and optimistic.  Even in the midst of pain and uncertainty of his condition, he simply said that he had to get better so he could get that painting done.  In his mind, his glass was definitely half full, he was going to make the most of it, and he was going to fill it completely.  Even if he is unable to accomplish this goal, I believe that he will readjust and be OK.

The second of these things is from a reading for in my devotional.  I picked up the book randomly at the beginning of the year because the cover spoke to me and it had 1 short, manageable devotion for each day of this year.  Many of them have spoken to me.  I decided to read ahead a little and the devotion for Jan 21th was LET YOUR WORDS BE POSITIVE AND FEW.  The bible verse connected was this “You heard Me tell you, I am going away and I am coming (back) to you.  If you (really) loved Me, you would have been glad, because I am going to the Father, for the Father is greater and mightier that I am.” John 14:28.  Jesus is going through such adverse circumstances but always chose to talk about them in a positive way.  The final part of the devotion is what the book calls a power thought and for this entry the power thought is “When I speak about my situations, I speak positively.”

So the combination of my current situation, the encounter with this remarkable patient, and my devotional has really caused me to look at how I view my world (half empty or half full) during this time in my life.  I think people are born with a positive outlook on life or a more negative one.  For me, I am a bit of a weird combination because while a do have many positive thoughts, I am also a worrier.  I am always thinking ahead and trying to figure out what to do to get the best outcome and I also have a habit of worrying about things that I have no control over.  I also have spent more years of my life than not with someone who always thinks the glass is half empty and found myself adopting that mindset as well over times.  Over the past year, I also was involved in a mentorship for my business that dealt with as much on mindset as it did with business development.  What I have learned is this, whether we are naturally pessimistic or naturally optimistic and whether our glass in naturally half full or half empty; we do have the power to change our perspective and it makes a huge difference.  For instance in my life,  late at night I have a tendency to lament that I feel I have wasted 20 years of my life, but I can instantly turn that around by remembering how lucky I am to have my 4 beautiful children.  I can also worry about what my future will look like or I can be thankful and optimistic about my future and realize I have control over what it becomes.  So, my practice is to make these mindset changes every time I find myself thinking the glass is half empty.  I am not 100% successful (especially late at night) but I am finding over time, it gets easier and more automatic and the more I do it, the lighter and happier I feel!

So, enough about me and onto the takehome for you!  I encourage you to take a look at your life and how you view it.  Because I am a nutrition and exercise coach, I will put it in to the context of that.  When thinking about what you eat, focus on what you are eating, not what you cannot have.  And with this, focus on how these foods make you feel.  If you slip and eat things you feel you shouldn’t, focus on the fact that you have the knowledge and are only one meal from being on track again.  When thinking about how you exercise, focus on what you are able to do, not what you are unable to do.  Be proud of the days that you are active and that will motivate you much more that beating yourself up about the days that you did not!


39 Things I Have Learned in My 39 Years

Chirstmas3     So, last week I turned 39.  It is not the big year that 40 is, but I think because it is close to 40 it made me especially reflective.  This past year has been a year of transition and changes personally and professionally.  Most notably I started my business Nurturing Fitness and I started teaching it my children’s co-op (they go to this once a week and I homeschool the remaining days).  My two greatest passions are helping other moms be more fit and healthy and my children.  I have been amazed at how life makes room for you to follow your passions!  While  health and fitness and helping other moms is my passion, starting the business has been way out of my comfort zone and very uncomfortable at times.  But, the fulfillment and growth I have gained far out-weight the discomfort.  My youngest and final child also turned 1 this year.  I guess because she is my last, it makes made me feel like her birthday was a turning point into a different stage of my life (which makes me a little excited but sad to be exiting my “baby years”).  All in all, I think I have grown and learning a lot over the last 39 years!  While I realize I still have a lot to learn, I wanted to share with you the 39 most important things I now know from living 39 years.  I was going to share all 39 in one post, but that was going to turn out to be a very long post.  So instead, I will include about half of them in this post and the remaining next week!

  1. Life is too short.  We never know how long we will live or how long those around us will live.  Although I am always working on this, I realize that I need to live each day to its most, tell those around me that I love them, and be true to myself and the Lord.
  2. Kids are a precious gift from God.  As I stated above, my last child turned a year old this year.  It made me think about what a miracle a child is and how amazing it is that they turn into little people from just a sperm and egg (also on my mind after reading to my boys about the birds and bees).  Along with this, I am much more aware that my children are gifts and that is how I should treat them each day.  Not that they should be spoiled, but they should be loved, respected, treated well, disciplined when necessary, and taught all the things necessary to be successful adults.  They are only on loan to me for a short time and it is my responsibility to raise them accordingly.
  3. Junk food may taste good but makes me feel bad.  When I was younger, I could splurge on pizza and ice cream and feel just fine the next day.  But now days, I will have a headache and stomach ache for several days if I do.  My bottom line is that it is now it is just as important to me how a food makes me feel as how it tastes.
  4. It is much easier to maintain your body than it is to lose.  After four pregnancies and recovering my pre-baby body back after each, I definitely want to be in a permanent maintenance mode now.  Maintenance mode doesn’t require a lot of thought or effort compared to trying to lose.  I also realize that as we get older, recovering takes more effort and time!
  5. I love foods that taste sweet and that will never change.  I have spent years wishing that I prefered savory to sweet because to me, it seems that it should be healthier.  I have tried to change my preferences but it is just not worth the effort or deprivation.  Sure I eat lots of healthy foods (veggies and protein), but I even want a little sweet taste in my salads and I am OK with that!
  6. Stress management is huge when it comes to mood, sleep, and body composition.  Including stress management tools in my life as a busy mom is crucial because stress raises cortisol levels.  Elevated cortisol levels cause all kinds of problems including belly fat, muscle wasting in arms and legs, sleep disturbances, and we all know if makes us short-tempered and grouchy.  There are some really fun things that I like to do to lower stress and these include massages (especially foot massages), pedicures, and talking with friends.  Walking is also an excellent way to lower stress.
  7. I have to take care of myself first to take care of everyone else.   This is a key for me mentally and physically.  I workout first thing in the morning because it makes me more energetic for the rest of the day, it makes me feel centered, it makes me more patient, and it puts me in a good mental place for the rest of the day.  Homeschooling two and taking care of two takes a lot of patience and energy.  I do a much better job if I stay with my early morning workouts.
  8. You can exercise too much.  Too much exercise (especially steady intensity cardio for hours at a time) has many repercussions that I have experienced which include increased appetite and cravings, sleep disturbances, fluid retention, muscle aches and pain, adrenal fatigue, and fat loss resistance.  There is a law of diminishing return when it comes to exercise and more is not better.  A balance of resistance circuits and cardio intervals is optimal for balancing hormones and fat loss.  An added  benefit is that it frees up more time to do other things.
  9. Healthy foods are not always fat loss foods.  Over the years I began to change the way I ate because I was listening to my body.  My diet became mostly protein and veggies because that is what made me feel the best.  Then, I started taking nutrition and exercise certification courses through Metabolic Effect and learned the science behind why these are best for me and make me feel the best.  It is all about balance metabolic hormones for optimal metabolism, energy, and body composition.  Some healthy foods such as whole grains and dairy do not have an optimal effect on metabolic hormones.  You can find out more about this HERE.
  10. People grow and change as they get older and sometimes they grow apart. This has been a hard lesson for me to learn and one that I am still dealing with.  I am not the same person I was when I was 20.  My faith has grown and priorities have changed.  My current perspective is that I must stay true to my beliefs and faith and more forward in life away from relationships that do not allow me to be myself or compromise my beliefs.
  11. Happiness is contagious.  You are much more likely to be happy and have a positive attitude if you surround yourself with others that are.  Living with someone that is negative does wear off on you!  Also, even if you are if a bad mood, try smiling!  I promise it will make you feel better!
  12. Nutrition is more important than exercise.  When it comes to being fit and healthy, how you eat has a greater effect than how you exercise.  It is not that exercise is not important (it is because it builds muscle and strengthens are heart), but when it comes to losing fat, what you choose to put in your mouth is key.
  13. Love and express yourself without regret.  I have spent a lot of my earlier years not expressing myself in a worry of what people might think of me.  When you are true to yourself and express the way you feel, you will attract those that should be around you.  My grandmother passed away when I was in my later 20’s suddenly, not too long after I had been to visit her.  Unfortunately, I had something else on my mind at the end of that visit and I do not remember kissing and hugging her and telling her how much I love her.  I still regret it to this day and try to always make sure I do not leave things unsaid.
  14. I still have a lot to learn.  Learning never stops.  With respect to life, my children are my great teachers and show me each day my flaws and gifts.  They also ask a ton of questions that I have to find the answers to.  With respect to health and fitness, as my body changes as I age, I continue to learn what it needs to stay healthy and fit.  With respect to my business and my job as a physical therapist, I will never stop learning, experiencing, and growing until I stop these activities.
  15. The greatest things we can instill in our kids are faith, self-esteem, a love of learning, and gratefulness.  I believe these are all keys to being happy and successful in life.  One of the reasons I decided to homeschool was to be able to provide my children with these things at a young age.
  16. Many things are much more important than money.  I became a physical therapist so that I could easily support myself, but when I became a mother, I gave up a lot of the money I could make because I felt staying home was more important than the money.  Sure, you have to pay the bills and that is why I work on the weekends.  I also have my business, but I have done that out of my passions (as it does not pay the bills).   I am much happier with my non-paying job (homeschooling and staying home with my kids) than I would be if I had a huge house and lots of money.  The thing about money is that no matter what, I think you feel like there is never enough and it definitely does not make you happy. 
  17. When you follow your passion, life makes room.  As I have mentioned, I started both my business and teaching in my children’s co-op this year.  I already had a very hectic schedule and really did not have time for anything more, but I felt a calling to do these things.  The amazing thing is that my life is no more hectic than it was before.  Yes, I do still have to prioritize and cannot get everything done, but it is no worse than before and I am more fulfilled.

Thanks for reading and stay tuned for the remaining next week!

Three Things I Learned at the Tough Mudder?


I am happy to announce that I am in fact a TOUGH MUDDER as of November the 3rd.  On this date, I completed a ten-mile run combined with approximately twenty obstacles in around four hours.  These obstacles included jumping into ice water, climbing fifteen foot walls, crawling through pipes, and lots of mud.   While I have run many road races when I was much younger and a 1/2 marathon last December, I have never done any races with obstacles.  To make it even more challenging for me, I ran the race with a team of people of which I only knew one person until the night before the race.  Teamwork in this sort of challenge is crucial to getting through some of the obstacles.  I am a private, shy person, so participation in a group that I am not familiar with is way out of my comfort zone.  But more importantly than just completing it, I had a really great experience.  It was a great experience because I finished, I did not get hurt, and I met a great group of teammates that I can now call my friends.  Are you wondering if I was awesome at the actual race?  The answer is no.  My knees started to hurt at about mile 8, so I could not run as well as I wanted.  I also skipped a couple of the obstacles because I was so cold that I could not bear to take another swim in cold, muddy water.  But, the benefits of the experience far out weighted the scrapes and bruises and few disappointments I had.  I wanted to share this experience with you because I learned a few things about myself that may be beneficial to you.


The first thing I already knew but had reinforced with the Tough Mudder is the IMPORTANCE AND BENEFIT OF GETTING OUT OF MY/YOUR COMFORT ZONE.  With this, I am meaning both your physical and mental comfort zone.  For me, I got out of my physical comfort zone with all of the obstacles and my mental comfort zone with the obstacles (and my fear of them) and the group dynamic.  The benefit of stepping out of your comfort zone is that this is where growth occurs both physically and mentally.  Physically, when you repeatedly step out of the comfort zone, you will become stronger and faster.  While one race did not make me stronger physically, I did feel soreness in muscles that I have not used in a while and was inspired to work at regaining some of this strength.  Mentally, stepping out also makes you stronger and more confident.  Personally, forcing myself to meet and work closely with my wonderful teammates resulted in a new group of friends, greater confidence in myself socially, and an increased comfort level for the next time I am in a similar situation.  To go along with this is the concept that the fear/nervousness you feel about something is usually worse than what will actually happen.  The bottom line and my advice to you is DO NOT LET YOUR FEAR AND APPREHENSION STOP YOU FROM STEPPING OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE.  I often tell my clients that if you keep doing things the same way you always have, you will keep getting the same results.


The second thing I learned about is the IMPORTANCE OF SUPPORT AND TEAMWORK.  My nutrition and exercise clients are always telling me how important that the easy, quick email access they have to me and the support/encouragement I give them is.  Many of my clients continue with me on a monthly basis after their initial program for ongoing exercises but also for the support/accountability.  For me, I love being encouraging and supportive for my clients, but do not thing I have understood the significance before now.  I am a very independent person, I workout alone, and typically do not seek the mental/emotional help of others.  This is probably because I spend most of my time with my kids and do not want to burden them and because I guess I have a little bit of a fear of others thinking I am silly and/or weak.  But from the Tough Mudder, I learned that teamwork and support are important to me as well.  They gave me the physical help I needed to complete some of the obstacles that I was not strong enough for.  They also gave me the mental strength to both try the obstacles I was scared of and to finish out the race, even when I was in pain.  The bottom line is that I learned (although I probably already should have known it) that teamwork and support make you stronger both in the group and on your own and allow you to accomplish things you could not have done before.


The final thing that was reinforced by the completion of the Tough Mudder is the IMPORTANCE OF TAKING TIME FOR MYSELF.  Taking time for myself, as I am sure it is for most moms, is very hard.  I homeschool my children Monday through Friday and work on Saturday and Sunday.  I also have never left my children with anyone but family.  To have a family member watch my children for anything but a necessary appointment or work, makes me feel guilty.  So, the idea of taking off work on a Sunday and leaving my kids did make me feel guilty and self-indulgent.  In this particular case, I probably would have cancelled if I had not been part of a team.  But I am thankful that I did take this time for myself.  It was one of the first times in a really long time that I have taken a whole day for me (without using for work) and focused on me and having fun.  So, taking this time for me had the following benefits: a mental break, physical workout, friendship, and lots of laughing and fun.  I woke up the following Monday a little sore but feeling invigorated, happy, and refreshed.  So for me, this translated into me signing up for a similar race next March and making time for me to return to the gym several times a week to work at my strength.  For you, my advice is to take time for yourself to do whatever renews and restores you.


I write this article, not encouraging everyone to run a Tough Mudder, but to encourage all moms to go out and do something for themselves.  It all goes back to the concept that by taking care of yourself first, you can do a better job of taking care of everyone else.

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